Imagine that you have two biscuit tins in on your kitchen shelf. One is the custard cream tin and the other is the chocolate bourbon tin. I know this might seem like an extremely silly question but if you want a custard cream biscuit which tin will you look in? Yes–of course–the custard cream tin. Yet, time and again people tell me that they have been looking in the chocolate bourbon tin expecting to find a custard cream in it. And vice versa. Illogical, wouldn’t you say? Biscuit tin theory can explain. Let’s look at an example:
You are not happy
Your partner has forgotten your anniversary again. They always do that, every year. It makes you sad and angry and really hurts your feelings every time it happens. You’ve tried leaving reminders around the place, tried dropping hints and even asking a friend to remind them. They are really good at random, romantic gestures but not at remembering anniversaries. Remembering the date and making plans to celebrate the day really matters to you. So you are not happy about this.
Custard creams love anniversaries – they buy cards, flowers and cake and take their partners out for meals. And they live in the custard cream tin. Whereas, bourbons are anniversary forgetters. They don’t like planned celebrations – they prefer spontaneity. And they live in the bourbon tin.
You are looking in the wrong biscuit tin
Well it seems to me that what is happening here is that your partner is a chocolate bourbon and you are looking in that tin every year expecting to find a custard cream, thus setting yourself up for disappointment every time. But they should remember our anniversary you might complain. And the reality is that they don’t. It’s in the nature of the bourbon biscuit and when you began this relationship you chose a bourbon!
So it sounds as if I am suggesting you should look in the custard cream tin to find an anniversary rememberer…that doesn’t seem right does it…your partner isn’t going to be in there are they? No. But you are! You are the perfect person to do the job of anniversary remembering – you are a custard cream!
Make sure you are looking in the right biscuit tin for what you want
It’s worth remembering the biscuit tin theory when you want or need something from someone else. Maybe, you want a lift to work when your car breaks down? Ah! That’ll be a Jammie Dodger job. You want someone to proof read your essay? A Rich Tea would do a great job of that with their excellent attention to detail. Pink wafers are terrific at helping you choose what to wear to the party. When you want someone to listen when you’ve had a hard day at work, what kind of biscuit might that be? You get the idea!
No matter how hard you try you can’t make your partner or child or friend into a different kind of biscuit. They can’t change your custard cream nature into that of a ginger snap or a hobnob – at least not for their convenience! But they love you for your custard cream ways!
What kind of biscuit are you?
What kind of biscuit are you? Do you prefer spontaneity or making plans? Leave me a comment to let me know.